Stuck in a Rut and Taking on Water

2020 in most ways was the year from hell. Or more aptly, the year of a hurricane mixed with a tornado mixed with an earthquake. But from the safety of our cabin, many made the most of it finding ways to pursue projects and passions from home, and surprisingly having a very productive year. For me personally, it was one of the most productive and focused years of output that I’ve had in quite some time (not that it was smooth sailing).

And because of this I expected 2021 to be even better.

I had finally gained consistency with several projects and began to mold aspects of my life that I intended to turn into career outlets that are fulfilling and I can support myself with. Lat year, it was all ragtag and pieced together, but the foundation was being set and the work was getting done.

Instead of yearly resolutions, I follow the Theme System (from the Cortex Podcast ) for my yearly outlook. The basics being you choose a theme as a guiding principle (i.e., Year of Refinement, Year of Prioritization, etc.) instead of set preconditioned goals.  Goals set immovable expectations. A theme allows for flexibility, a larger sense of purpose, and focus when working on projects (or anything in life).

I gave 2021 the theme of Growth. I wanted to take what I started or gain consistency with in 2020 and take those endeavors to the next step. Be it audience growth, regular consistent postings, or better workflows, everything should be more or better, but all relative to the respective projects and my current life situation.

I also added in a planning aspect (The Focus Planner) to my daily project preparation. It was a system that outlines project needs into smaller components to help chip away in a more focused way.

With these two systems I felt ready. Ready for my voyage that is 2021. I took the first two weeks in January to map out what growth specifically meant on different projects, setting benchmarks and defining actionable tasks. It felt great to have a plan and a scoped out schedule based on quarters of the year indicating when to focus on projects at specific times.

Annnndddd… within a month, it all imploded. Or at least it felt like it did. A perfect storm of a spike in day job responsibilities, including producing two major events, WFH challenges with two working parents of a toddler, along with the multiple side hustle projects contributed to what felt like a slow motion crash. All of that planning and intention went sideways.

I was taking on water and my ship was sinking before I had barely started my journey.

I could see it all happening but was helpless to stop it. Everything became a chore as I struggled just to get some bits of work done on projects to keep them alive. But I was so exhausted at the end of the day, that I was lucky to get done what I did.

It was, and still is, a frustrating feeling. I wanted to focus on these projects and the tasks it takes to complete them. I had set up a detailed map, a plan. Wanting to enact that plan. But the problem with any plan is that it is contrived under a specific set of considerations, usually ideal circumstances, which for me (and many people) translates to time.

I scoped out this plan under ideal circumstances (for time), expecting to be able to get in a routine and be the ideal of myself — focused, attentive, pumping out quality content and updates. But in reality it’s an overshot. It’s always unrealistic because you know, life (and human petulance).

As stated earlier, with a packed day of a full-time job, family, health and fitness activities, social needs, topped off with numerous side hustle projects, it’s a recipe for planning to go haywire.

The fortunate part is that I was recognizing that this was happening while it was happening. At first, I’m trying to push through, soldier on, but then realized that I had to make adjustments. The current setup was not conducive to my needs, goals, or intentions and that I wasn’t making suitable progress on any level. This is when I began to self reflect and figure out a better way forward.

Reset. Refocus.

There are endless ways to refocus efforts and make changes, but for me, the best remedy to this situation is to clear things out. Simplify down to what are the principal needs, focusing on a few select groups of areas and tasks that are most important.

This isn’t easy to do in the best of circumstances, but is necessary in difficult ones. It’s hard to put ideas and tasks on hold, but it must be done to advance toward a larger goal.   Because instead of pushing forward with the status quo, I have to recognize that some sort of change is needed.

Now how do I fix or alleviate the blocking issues. A great part of the Theme System is that, it is a ground mechanism for when things go off track. It is built around the idea of flexibility and acting as a guiding light. So I asked, ‘What do I need to do help grow my projects?” Is it doing something more? Doing something less? Doing something different? Is it a small change or a drastic change? Is it a change with the workload or personal needs?

I am eventuating all of this at the moment but starting with small changes. My biggest change is I have reduced my daily journaling. This was a difficult choice as I really enjoy doing it and know it brings quantified accountability to my daily work. But the journaling itself was taking time from the most crucial areas of focus, namely writing. Additionally, I decided to keep the daily planning system in my routine and will revisit the journaling when I feel I can reincorporate it back into my daily routine.

I also have project procedure tasks that are on a recurring cadence such as these essays and my podcasts, so I evaluated those as well, since they require a significant overhead of focus and energy. In keeping them both, I have decided that I will pull back to posting an essay every other week, rather than every week as I had originally planned. This was basically how the cadence was in reality, but I was sticking to my original weekly cadence in my mind, burdening myself with unnecessary pressure. Once I accepted that reality, it was a relief. I will strive to get to a higher output cadence, but until then, produce what is realistic now.

My output for the podcast was, and still is, a high priority. I want to stick to a set record and posting schedule. In the past, I would get backed up on edits and I don’t want that to happen this year. It is important to post on a reliable schedule, especially when building an audience.

What I am doing with the evaluation is taking what I practiced and learned from my yearly theme from 2020 — prioritization. It is choosing no more than three areas to focus on and having tunnel vision on those things.

What I listed above are just a few examples of the prioritizing that I am doing with more to come, but even with just these changes and decisions I already feel less burdened and more productive.

Since making these changes, I felt more compelled to dive into the work, regardless of how my morning routine has gone. Regardless if I’ve done my planning or journaling. Regardless of all the other tasks I have to do.

This is not to say that I have solved my problem or am out of my rut yet. I still have to do the work. I still need to motivate myself. I still need to push through the friction of my daily life because that has not changed.

I have many more projects schedule to start soon, but first I need to steady the ship on my current endeavors before I take on more weight. Because my productive should not be measured by how many projects I am working on (even though the itch to do them all is there), but the end output result AND quality of that work.

I won’t always be in this unproductive period, which is an understanding that will help weather this storm. And thankfully I have a theme guiding me to realize what is important on this journey and what to throw overboard. Instead of turning the ship around, I am continuing on my voyage.